Monday Morning Music (OK, it's not morning, but I did have the day off afterall)

So, I was listening to some of my niece's music while she was working on a paper (that is due tomorrow) and one of the song's was "Stay" by Sugarland.  While I enjoy some of Sugarland's stuff, I find I am not overly happy with this one.  I am offended by the wishy washy woman hoping the phone doesn't ring calling her married lover back to his wife.  I am morally opposed to women allowing themselves to be used and thrown away whether they are the wife or the other woman.  So I was inspired to find music that shows women as strong and independent beings who take crap from no one.  These are the type of women I look up to and they type I strive to be.  Please do not thisnk that this means I hate men or think they a re all without worth.  On the contrary, I have had the opportunity to many quite a few real men who are strong, loyal and true.  Men who deserve and stay with these type of strong women.  So, here are just a few of the songs I came across about strong, take-no-crap women.  Enjoy!

Aaron Tippen - Kiss This

Miranda Lambert - White Liar

Carrie Underwood - Before He Cheats

Laura Bell Bundy - Giddy On Up

Monday Morning Music - Brothers of the Sun

As I was driving in to work this morning I heard Kenny Chesney's "Out Last Night", which seems to sum up his public image attitude toward life in general.  I can get behind this completely.  If ever there was a man who know how to work hard and play hard, it's Kenny Chesney.  As I was listening to this song, and singing along as well, I was thinking about the announcement that came out recently about the Brothers of the Sun Tour reuniting Kenny Chesney and Tim McGraw, who sings one of my all-time favorite songs, "Indian Outlaw".  He is another country artist who knows how to balance work, play and family.  These 2 fine (both in talent and in sheer masculine beauty) toured together back in 2001 and are going back out on the road together this year.  I looked up the concert dates and I sincerely hope I can get to a show as I think this is going to be EPIC!  They will also have Jake Owens with them as an up and coming country star who has already won my music heart with his song "Yee Haw"  So this morning I leave you with few words and many songs.

Kenny Chesney 2001 "Don't Happen Twice"

Tim McGraw 2001 "The Cowboy in Me"

Kenny Chesney 2011 "Reality" (sorry, couldn't find a real one that didn't look pirated)

Tim McGraw 2011 "Felt Good on My Lips"

Jake Owens "Yee Haw"

And the song that got everything started this morning, Kenny Chesney "Out Last Night"

And,of course, Tim McGraw "Indian Outlaw"

ENJOY!!! (And let me know if you have an extra ticket to the show)

I'm Sorry Mom

I would like to take this opportunity to say, "I'm sorry mom."

I'm sorry for every eye roll in teenage angst when I was completely convinced you were without a clue as to what I was dealing with.

I'm sorry for every wake up call you gave me so that I could be on time even though I was fully capable of getting myself up, I was just too lazy to make it a priority.

I'm sorry for every phone call from school asking you to bring this or that massively important object that I left behind because I was too busy complaining about being up to think about what I needed.

I'm sorry for every time I spoke to you as if you had 3 heads and couldn't possibly understand the words coming out of my mouth unless they were layered with attitude and frosted with barely concealed disgust.

I'm sorry for the late nights you spent waiting for me to get back from some event with no regard for your schedule.

I'm sorry for all the rides I promised to my friends without asking you first if it was convienent or even possible.

I'm sorry for making you tell me to clean my room, shut off the light, do the dishes, or any other every day chore that I thought was beneath me and therefore ignored until you nagged me so I could be superior and angry again for your constant lack of understanding.

I'm sorry for not appreciating all that you did every day to make my life comfortable, secure and safe.

I'm sorry for not listening to you when you tried to get me to work harder in school.

I'm sorry for every grade I got that was less than my best.

I'm sorry for every hair I turned grey with my lack of thought beyond my own pleasures, wants and needs.

I'm sorry for every petty fight with my siblings that could have been and should have been avoided.  (Even though they sometimes deserved it)

I'm sorry for the damage I did to the house during some of these fights with my siblings.  (Most of which was their fault after all)

I'm sorry for every worry I put you though with my recklessness and lack of respect for others property.

And I'm very sorry you had to put up with all of this from my siblings 10 times more than you ever did with me, cause we all know I was the good one.

Love you mom!!!

Points of View - Teenager vs. Adult

I have come to realize that there is a basic difference in how teenagers and adults view different situations.  I find this a little odd since I used to be a teenager and I don't remember having this kind of a problem but the more teenagers I deal with the more I see that it is, in fact, a pretty big chasm of misunderstanding.  I have outlined a few areas where this difference in understand seems pretty evident.

1.  Homework
Adult - Homework is necessary to reinforce skills, promote memorization as well as a good work ethic.
Teenager - it' stupid, worthless, teachers just do it because they're power hungry idiots!

2.  Chores
Adults - Chores help teach responsibility, household skills, a beginning to independence and ownership of a teens surroundings.
Teenager - it's stupid, worthless, parents just make you do them because they're power hungry idiots

3.  Dating
Adults - This is a time to go out with different people, get to know a variety, enjoy this time in your life and make good choices about who you date.
Teenager - you mean you actually might go to prison?!?!  That's so cool!!!  I think I love you even though we're only been dating for 3 hours.  Of course, I've only known you for 4 hours but we will be together forever, I promise!!  I love you so much baby!!!

4.  Grades
Adult - You need to apply yourself to your studies so you can get into a good college, get scholarships and be able to support yourself through your career
Teenager - there is plenty of time to get my grades up, I'm not a senior yet.  Grades aren't important, they don't show the real me.  Grades are an antiquated method of showing nothing and should not be used to judge my self-worth, besides, I'm gonna be a famous .... (rock star, actor, rapper, football player, skateboarder, jockey, etc)

5.  Promptness
Adult - You need to be on time.  If I say 7:00, you should be ready to go by 6:55.  When you are late you inconvenience everyone, not just yourself.
Teenager - I'm only 5 minutes late, what's your problem?!  No body's gonna care if we get to there late!  You're so uptight!

6.  Consequences
Adult - You stayed out 3 hours past curfew, you totaled the car and ran over the cat.  You are grounded for a month, no friends over, no computer, and no cell phone.  You need to learn that this kind of behavior in not acceptable
Teenager - no cell phone?!?!  are you freakin' kidding me?!?!  You are so mean!!! I hate you!!!

7.  Time of Crime
Adult - You teacher called today and told up you haven't done your homework all quarter.  This is a serious problem and it needs to change.
Teenager - this quarter is over, I turned in my homework today, the rest of that all happened over a week ago so it's no big deal.  Why are you making such a mountain out of this, it's in the past; get over it already

8.  Tone and Attitude
Adult - You need to keep the attitude out of your voice while we discuss this issue, don't take a rude tone and watch what you are saying.  How you deal in stressful situations is being learned right now while we deal with your behavior.
Teenager - you're being rude with me so I can say anything I want.  I'm angry so I get to swear at you and yell and blow up, but don't worry, I'll apologize later and then you can forget all about this...until I do it again next time.  What do you mean?  Of course "I'm sorry" fixes it.  So what if I've said it 25 times this week for the same thing, I still said it?  You just hate me.

9. Rules
Adult - We have set certain rules so you can  learn responsibility, and we can make sure you are safe and cared for.
Teenager - rules are just a parents way of trying to suck all the fun out of being a kid.  I swear, my parent must have hatched from a bod; no way they were kids once, they are so clueless!

10.  Parenting
Adult - We do not set these rules and expectations to make you miserable, we do it to help you grow, mature and take your place in adult society and find all the success and happiness we hope for you.  It is not fun and it doesn't make us feel better or powerful to enforce rules, assign consequences or lecture about the same thing over and over until it sinks in.
Teenager - blah, blah, blah.  When I'm a parent I'm gonna let my kids do anything they want and I'm not going to make them follow any rules cause rules are stupid and you have no idea what it's like to be a kid.  Just leave me alone!!  You don't care!!

Yep, it's a slippery slope and very little of it makes any sense.  The biggest hope we have is when we look at our parents and watch they snicker behind their hands as they watch us have these conversations over and over again with our kids.  It appears to be a vicious cycle, but at least someday we get to be at their point in the circle of growing. 

I'm really looking forward to that.

Ah Those Summer Nights...from my friend hat

As the weather has started to turn and I shiver my way through scrapping the car every morning, my thoughts return more and more to this past summer and all the evenings we spent just relaxing on our porches.

At Missy and Todd's place we would spend countless hours sipping on Capt and cokes while we watched the world sizzle from the heat of the day and cool into the evening hours with bright huge moons and screaming motorcycles keeping us company.  Their dog, Harley would often lay on our feet as we talked about everything and nothing.  We found solutions to personal and family problems as well as national and global issues.  We laughed at and with our kids while they squealed from the tickles or the squeezes or huffed away to ignore us after we'd teased them about romance or school or whatever they had done that had made us roll our eyes that day.  We sat in silence and listened to the night gentle push the day and it's headaches aside.  Occasionally one of the kids would join us in the philosophical discussions but for the most part they stayed inside playing music on the computer and for the most part completely ignoring those adults who are so foolish as to prefer to be outside where there is not immediate entertainment through technology.  (Yes, Missy, I know Todd and I are addicted to our phones but let's be reasonable, that's usually all we took outside)

Some night we would end up on my back porch sipping on margaritas or some other tasty concoction (well, Missy and I did, Todd just kept drinking his Capt and coke).  Back there we were isolated from the world beyond my back yard. Just good friends, lots of laughs and my cat, Wade (whom Todd likes to call Lloyd). The moon was just as glorious and the talks just as far reaching as the stars but the distractions of the street out front we left to the kids who spent hours hanging out there, as far away from the adults as they could go.  As before there was some intermixing of kids and adults but these times were brief and infrequent, which suited all of us well.

Most of these nights we unplanned or as casually discussed as possible with a simple, "U comin over 2nite?" txt or just a knock on the door and a bottle in hand as we walked through each others houses.  I think that was the best part about the whole thing, that we could and did do that to and with each other on a regular basis.  What a comfort to know that you are welcome any time and that all other activity would either stop and socializing would happen or, whoever had just invaded would pitch in and help finish whatever task was being tackled at the time.  Todd was (and is) always good for a kid distraction.  They love messing with him and my daughter especially loved his big crushing gorilla hugs and squealing in his ear.  I think he really enjoys it too although he might not admit to that. 

Sometimes we would be joined by our friend Paulie.  He was always welcome but not always available.  He joined us frequently for cocktails and conversation.  Paulie is highly animated, informed and entertaining and I still do not get to spend nearly enough time with him.  he greatly added to our enjoyment of warm summer evenings and lively conversations.

There were also some memorable evenings gathering with multiple friends to share camaraderie, laughs and a few short happy hours.  Laughter again was the goal and I think we found success.  These evenings strengthened friendships, built new ones and generally added great spice to my life.  I can only hope it did the same for those I was with.  Now that the days have grown shorter and fuller and have left us with less time and heat to enjoy porch nights, I can't help but look forward to next summer and more time laughing and loving and enjoying all of the blessings I have in my life.

Monday Morning Music - FLASH MOB

Good Morning!  I have been fascinated lately with the flash mob phenomenon so I thought I'd find a Christmas flash mob to share this morning.  Boy did I open a can of worms!  There are thousands upon thousands of flash mob videos on you tube and I have to choose just one?!  Not possible.  So I chose to share 2 of them.  One  is from the Carlson School of Management in UMN, where it seems they have been hit by flash mobs for that once, something you might want to think about when choosing a school, lol.  The other is from a website called RedefineChristmas.org.  Very sweet.  Anyway, enjoy the music and the show, I know I did.

The Power of Words

         Have you ever thought about how powerful a word can be?  Think about it, with just 1 word you can rip a person apart or sew their lives back together.  You can make sunshine out of a thunderstorm or bring on the blackest night that never ends.  Too much?  Let me give an example.   

        

Suppose you spent 3 hours getting ready to go out.  You have pampered and primped, picked the perfect outfit, spent extra time getting your hair and make up as near to perfection as possible and the image in the mirror is so stunning you can hardly believe it’s real.  You step into party/club/gathering for which you have prepared and you feel like a million bucks.  All is right with your world and you are ready to conquer Mt. Rushmore.  Then you see someone in the corner point at you and you just overhear them talking to their friend, sneering and the only word you hear is “Heifer”.  Now how do you feel?  

 Yep, words have power; a lot of power.  They have the power to heal as well though.  For example, imagine you have had the worst week of your life.  You lost your job, your car broke down, you boyfriend/girlfriend/husband or wife has confessed to cheating for the past 3 years and they no longer want to have anything to do with you and, oh yea, they have already cleared out your joint bank account so now you can't even buy a bottle to drown your sorrows.  Ok,  that is a truly crappy week, but you happen to see an old friend while you are wandering mindlessly around the block contemplating what else could possibly happen to you and the largest smile lights up their face, they open their arms and grab you in a vicious bear hug and and say, "Dude!" with all the enthusiasm of a starving man in front of a Christmas banquet.  

Words have power.

How many of us remember a cutting remark someone made 20 years ago?  How about the unexpected compliment you got that long ago as well?  That old rhyme we used about sticks and stones never really worked for me.  Words have power.

Along with words having power, words can lose power when misused.  How many of us are not even shocked when we hear the "F" bomb being dropped in daily conversation.  This used to be a highly inflammatory four letter word and now it is getting to be common place.  It is losing its power to shock and offend due to over use.  We not only accept but really expect it from some comics, musicians and others in our lives.  I have to admit there still is a large shock potential to this word.  Example?  If my daughter says it, I'm not shocked; when she's mad she drops this bomb but if my mom or dad said it?  The world would stop spinning on its axis and all life would cease.  Total and complete shock.  They still have power with that word.  They have not abused or over used it.  I am ashamed to say I have let it lose some power as well but I think I can still reclaim some of the power by refusing to let this bomb drop way too often.

Any word that has power can lose power when abused, misused or over used.  Other words with power?

Sorry
Love
Hate

What power words did I miss?